What If Michael Bay Wrote The Dark Knight?
“Bruce: We hack the internet.
Alfred: Hack the internet?
Bruce: Yes, hack the internet.
General: No one’s ever hacked the internet before.
Bruce: Well, there’s a first time for everything.
General: Okay, I like it. But which one of the internets do we hack?
Bruce: All of them.”
Sound like a Michael Bay film? Wait, there’s more!
“We pan to a beautiful woman: platinum blonde with a huge rack. She is the hottest woman in the world, but she wears glasses because she is also the smartest woman in the world.”
That is a description of Rachel Dawes, played by Maggie Gyllenhaal in the soon to be released Dark Knight. These golden nuggets of humour come from Michael Bay’s version of The Dark Knight…which Michael Bay did not write. Spill.com did. Although, they do capture the spirit of a Michael Bay film. Lots of nonsense, good looking females and explosions. Oh and cars.
To read the script by ‘Michael Bay’ click here!
Thanks to Steve for the tip!
TV Land renews She’s Got the Look
After She’s Got the Look showed steady ratings gains and growth in popularity, TV Land has decided to bring it back for a second season. This time they will expand the six episodes to eight. Premiering in 2009, She’s Got the Look 2 will once again search for a sophisticated, beautiful woman over the age of 35 who was destined for supermodel status.
Allison Grodner, executive producer of Blowout and Big Brother will helm the program once more. She’s excited TV Land picked up the show: “I’m thrilled that TV Land viewers can’t get enough of She’s Got The Look. I love the show and I am proud to be a part of a project that celebrates both age and beauty.”
TV Land president Larry W. Jones feels the same way: “The show’s message of reinvention and the pursuit of life-long dreams is something identifiable to our audience of 40 and 50 year olds. We can’t wait to introduce our viewers to another group of ageless beauties.” I have to agree with both Grodner and Jones. I can’t vouch for how entertaining She’s Got the Look is or isn’t, but I’m for any show that promotes beauty and self-confidence at any age.
The show is hosted by model Kim Alexis. The judges include Sean Patterson, president of Wihelmina Models; Beverly Johnson, the first African-American model to grace the cover of Vogue; and Robert Verdi, an in-demand stylist who has worked with Eva Longoria and Hugh Jackman. However, there is no confirmation as of yet that Alexis or the judges have signed for season two.
I remember seeing the promos for this show and thinking, “Wow, they got Beverly Johnson to be a judge.” She’s been on hundreds of magazine covers. She’s also written a few books. I thought that Johnson’s feedback for these women would probably be more helpful and more real than say, Tyra’s and Janice’s on Top Model. Not that Banks and Dickinson aren’t experienced models — it’s just that sometimes their feedback waxes dramatic and contrived.
We Almost Had Your Back, Mischa
We wanted to go on record and say that Mischa Barton is beautiful.
We wanted to denounce those recent nasty barbs about her cellulite as getting on our non-size-0 nerves.
We had planned to stand on the rooftops and scream, “Mischa Barton is not out of shape! She is a beautiful woman, and even beautiful women have a little cellulite! Back off!”But then she went out in public Wednesday night in NYC dressed like Punky Brewster dipped in Mary-Kate Olsen sauce, and we found ourselves having to take it all back.
Damn you, Mischa!
Josh Homme & Brody Dalle Have a Girl
Queens of the Stone Age frontman Josh Homme and Distillers’ singer Brody Dalle have welcomed a daughter, PEOPLE has learned.
Camille Homme was born in Los Angeles on Tuesday, and weighed in at 6 lbs. 15 oz. This is the couple’s first child.
Both mother and daughter are doing very well, the new parents said in a statement.
“They are honestly the most beautiful couple you could ever see,” Eagles of Death Metal frontman Jesse Hughes told MTV.com in September when the couple announced they were expecting. “Brody is a beautiful, expecting woman who is also the queen of rock and roll, in my opinion.”
Dalle was previously married to Rancid frontman Tim Armstrong.