Super Skank Wednesday: A list for your consideration
Welcome to Super Skank Wednesday. This is where I celebrate the awesomely skanky people on the following shows: Flavor of Love, I Love New York (or whatever show Tiffany Pollard is making next), The Surreal Life, Charm School, and Miss Rap Supreme.
After the jump, I have a list for you. I call it, “The 10 Most Fabulous Flavorettes and Rockettes.” Not those Rockettes. Not the ones who kick really high and line-up in different formations and perform at Radio City. Bret’s Rockettes! Okay, it’s a bad name, but what else do I call them (especially when Flav refers to his skanks as “Flavorettes”)?
Let’s chat for a moment first. There’s nothing all that skanky on TV lately. Miss Rap Supreme has disappointed in the drama department. Flavor of Love is officially over. Rock of Love has been over. And VH1 hasn’t started its tour de force of skank for the summer yet. I plan on covering I Love Money, New York Goes to Hollywood, and Brooke Knows Best. I’ll probably watch Luke’s Parental Advisory and The Cho Show too. But Margaret Cho is fabulous, not skanky.
Until then, what should I watch? Do you have any suggestions? I’m thinking Living Lohan and Denise Richards: It’s Complicated. I winced when I saw that Dina Lohan has her own show. Do you know that the Lohans live really close to my family? It’s sad. I’m kind of ashamed. I hope no one I love gets a rash.
As for Denise Richards, I’m not entirely sure that she’ll be entertaining. She’s kind of bland. And what is so complicated? Is it being pretty? Being rich? Being famous? Oh, I know. Maybe it’s that she was married to a degenerate gambler and then rebounded with her best friend’s ex-husband. By the way, is it gambling with Charlie Sheen? Or is it crack? No, crack is Bobby Brown’s vice, right? Speaking of shows I miss, I can just hear Whitney saying “Crack is WHACK” right now.
Anyway, your thoughts are much appreciated. It was a SSW reader who first mentioned The Bad Girls Club and I am ever-grateful.
Here’s my list…
The 10 Most Fabulous Flavorettes and Rockettes (Not Those Rockettes, the Other Ones)
10. Hotlanta: She had to get checked for Herpes on the show. Anyone who gets checked for the jerps on national television and still stays to compete for the love of a has-been rapper is fabulous. Also, fabulous was Hotlanta’s considerable drinking. I loved her confessionals. She hiccuped the whole time and would laugh about it like “Tee hee, I only had this much to drink.” She even showed up at her own wedding (well, fake celebreality wedding) drunk and blurped in Flav’s face during the vows.
9. Buckeey: Always scheming with her girl Bootz, Buckeey caught my attention when she tried to push Krazy off the balcony. Buckeey came back for Charm School; this time using her real name, Shay. However, this time around, Shay showed us that she was truly fabulous and even had a hand in picking the final two contestants.
8. Lacey: She’s definitely the most evil on this list but Lacey did add to the level of amusement on Rock of Love 1. When her father arrived, we were treated to just how psychotic Lacey really was.
7. Hottie: Remember that first time Hottie was alone with Flav? She whipped off her robe to reveal very large, very unbridled boobs. Yeah, I can’t forget that either. It gives me bad dreams. But, Hottie was fabulous. She was a caricature more than a real person. Even Mo’Nique pointed it out at the Charm School reunion. She told Hottie that she plays a character as Hottie blinked wildly and looked completely confused.
6. Daisy: Speaking of psychos, this girl is completely unhinged…in a fabulous way, of course. Bret broke her already broken little heart when he chose Ambre during the finale of Rock of Love 2. Heroine chic, reminiscent of a Fraggle, and a complete imbecile — I don’t think anyone will forget Daisy.
5. Buckwild: The contrived accent is the best part about Buckwild. She’s a funny girl to begin with. Add the accent and she’s over-the-top. I love how Flav called her out on season 2 of Flavor of Love.
4. Shy: I was so sad when Shy left this season. She was the best thing that happened to Flavor of Love 3. “They call me Shy-Shein cause I heal your heart and I take away the PAIN!” It’s a little sad I remember that. Viva la Shy-town!
3. Angelique: Maybe I should have put Angelique at number one. She’s my favorite. From the subtitles for her outrageous accent to the fun times on the stripper pole, Angelique provided much of the laughter on Rock of Love 2. I know it’s little, but here’s my favorite Angelique move. She and Inna took their chairs and put them in front of the other girls who got dressed up to wait for Bret’s return.
2. Heather Chadwell: She’s definitely the biggest bad-ass to ever grace the celebreality world. And she’s still the best woman for Bret. I would say Heather should’ve won Rock of Love 1 but I think you know, if she did, Rock of Love 2 would have never happened. My favorite Heather moment? It’s not when she gave Daisy a beat down at the reunion. I loved when she threw a bottle of water at Daisy in the hotel.
1. New York: How could number one not be Tiffany “New York” Pollard? What a woman! She’s the girl who put Flavor of Love on the map. Sure, Flav is great. But, New York caused so much drama. She was the skank you loved to hate. Even when Pumkin spit on her, I was like, ’yep, she deserved that one.’ Not that I advocate spitting; I think it’s disgusting. I would have more respect for Pumkin if she hit New York. But, I have to admit, I didn’t feel bad for New York either. But then, in the turn-around-of-the-century, I fell in love with New York when she got her own show. Okay, turn-around-of-the-century is a little hyperbolic. But, I even felt bad for New York when Tango left her at the reunion. “No one treats New York like that,” I said indignantly as I waved my finger in the air. This summer New York is getting another show, New York Goes to Hollywood. I’m there.
So, did I get it right? Who did I miss? Who should have been number one?
Monica Keena Biography
Monica Keena was born in New Jersey on May 25th, 1979 and was raised in Brooklyn. She’s about 5′1 and has an older sister named Samantha. Her mother, Mary is a nurse and her father, Bill, is a financial sales manager. As a child, she was always drawing, painting, dancing and signing.
Monica auditioned for acceptance into LaGuardia High School of Performing Arts at the age of thirteen. Although she chose the drama department as her preference, Monica was accepted in both the dramatic and the vocal arts departments. Soon after starting her classes at LaGuardia Monica played in her first role in a short film entitled “Burning Love,”. She also went on to portray the character Bertha in a stage reading of Strinburg’s “The Father,” with Al Pacino.
She’s had small roles in the Films “The Devil’s Advocate” and “While You Were Sleeping” and starred in the films “Strike, Ripe and Snow White : A Tale of Terror”
Monica has appreared in numerous television and movie projects inclding the TBS Superstation Original Movie “First Daughter” and “Crime and Punishment in Suburbia” which appeared in the 2000 Sundance Film Festival.Also awaiting release are the independent movie “The Simian Line” with Harry Connick Jr. and Lynn Redgrave, and “A Fate Totally Worse Than Death” with Julie Benz, and Jonathan Brandis.
She’s also no stranger to television having a recurring role as Abby Morgan on “Dawson’s Creek” and a starring role on the short-lived “Undeclared” as the college co-ed Rachel. Monica also had guest roles on series such as Law and Order, Homocide: Life on the Street, and Feds.
Before taking a break for new movies and tv, Monica attended New York University as an English major. When she has a bit of extra time on her hands she likes to take writing classes and likes yoga. Monica enjoys reading. One of her favorite authors is William Faulkner. She also likes the books the Bloody Chamger by Angela Carter, and Metamorphisis by Franz Kafka. She likes hanging out with friends and says: “I don’t do anything physical. I’m lazy.”, However Monica does enjoy roller skating with friends at Roller Rinks
Some other things Monica has said to have liked are Bob Dylan, the Police, and Tori Amos (a personal Fav !) The Movie, the Wizard of Oz, especially Judy Garland, of whom she says: “Judy Garland is my favourite. I probably know all her songs and have seen all her movies.” Her favorite T.V Shows include The Simpsons and Charmed.
Monica’s most recent project is the much anticipated summer movie “Freddy vs. Jason” in which she has a starring role. Look for that coming August 2003!. Monica lives in New York while not working on film or movie roles.
The Hills’ Lauren Conrad on the High Road
The Hills’ Lauren Conrad on the High Road
Reality shows are such an interesting phenomena. The aspect of having a camera around 24-7 makes most people pretty uncomfortable. For the stars of MTV’s The Hills, there is never a shortage in the drama department.
The reality show’s second season ended with Lauren Conrad’s roommate, Heidi Montag, moving out of their shared apartment to get a condo with her much-reviled boyfriend, Spencer Pratt. Since then, the relationship between the former best friends has disappeared faster than Courtney Love’s waistline.
Montag and Pratt were even implicated in leaking a recent Perez Hilton weblog item about a sex tape featuring Conrad and her ex-boyfriend, Laguna Beach star Jason Wahler.
“It’s pretty hurtful when people use your misfortune to get press,” says Conrad.
Regardless of her recent falling out with her friends, Lauren doesn’t let life get her down.
“I have great family and friends that love me and know what really happens, and that’s all that matters,” Conrad shrugs. “People are always going to make up talk, so you really just can’t let it phase you. I mean, it obviously hurts and it’s really hard to deal with, but I’ve kind of learned to let it go.”
So, how much of the real Lauren Conrad do we see on “reality TV”? “I think I come out pretty normal,” Conrad told CanWest News. “But I think I behave a little more on camera. When fans come up to you, a lot of them are little girls and that’s a really good reminder that you are responsible for what kids are looking up to. You don’t want some of your behaviour - that may be acceptable for a 21 year old - to been seen as cool by younger girls.”
As long as you keep taking the high road, you’ll come out on top. Lauren Conrad sets a great example of that, so take notice.
Enjoy the pictures of Lauren shooting at the airport this past week!