Hizzoner, the Mayer of Fibbington
With rumors spreading like wildfire, perhaps the best thing to do is spread some more…kinda like firemen setting a backfire to sap a blaze’s energy. Maybe that’s John Mayer’s strategy, because he told the crowd at his St. Louis show last night:
“When I was a child I would kill small animals and wear their teeth as necklaces. True. Print that. And I’ve always felt deep down that I was born a woman.”
On tour with Jennifer Aniston in tow, John set off on this goofy rumor jag after telling the amused multitudes that he enjoyed it when fans emailed him dubious tales from the tabloids. Some of the other felicitous fabrications, per People magazine, which John shared with the crowd:
He fears the color green. He weighed 400 pounds when he was 12. He wrote the lyrics to the Kenny Loggins hit “Danger Zone” at age 9. And he’s “33 percent done” with building a time machine.
Nice going, John. With rumors this good, who needs reality?
Family Guy: McStroke
(S06E08) In a mild parody of the movie Super Size Me, Peter suffers a stroke after eating too many fast-food hamburgers. Meanwhile, Stewie becomes the most popular student at James Woods High School, despite being a baby.
Family Guy has such potential to be an original and funny series and so much of it is wasted. I saw hints of really good ideas in the episode but those were superseded by some hack writing and poorly executed material. Another reason to loathe the WGA Strike.
Spoilers after the jump.
To begin, this episode copied The Simpsons plot device of leading into the main story with an unrelated one. That wouldn’t be so bad if the plot were good, but it wasn’t.
It is interesting how none of the ancillary characters appeared in this episode. There was no Cleveland (although there was a reference to him), no Joe and no Quagmire. There was, however, a talking cow voiced by Ricardo Montalban.
The main plot of Peter suing McBurgerWorld was jumbled. It started with him growing a mustache then did a non sequitur, going to Peter having a stroke from eating thirty hamburgers (he saved the McBurgerWorld manager from a fire. The fire department let him do it because he had a mustache and apparently all firemen have mustaches. Make of that what you will). The plot then turned and Peter sued the McBurgerWorld company after his stroke was magically healed by a stem cell research lab he walks into. Then he had to save a cow from the McBurgerWorld slaughterhouse called Da-cow (very lame Holocaust joke). The whole “A” plot felt like three or four unrelated stories.
(I could make a South Park-inspired manatee joke here, but I’ll leave that to you.)
The “B” plot, on the other hand, was decent. They even foreshadowed it with their One Tree Hill parody (”There’s nothing that can’t be fixed by staring at a lake”). I enjoy a good parody of teen-angst high school television shows. The lines were funny, such as going to Anal Point and the teen girl saying “O.M.G.” Even the revenge bit at the end where Stewie has the girl arrested for kissing a baby was funny.
Funny stuff included the Monopoly Man in The Shawshank Redemption, the Wimpy joke, the Will Smith rap, and when Stewie was offered the breasts of the teenage girl with the response “No thanks. I’m stuffed.” The lame stuff included the entire mustache storyline, the sudden use of the stem cell lab, the Italian joke, the Robin Williams joke, the horse leg joke and the buff hamster joke. The Monkees-themed chase scene felt weird and out of place.
Overall, other than a few high points, I’d have to say this episode was a downer. The writer’s strike could be blamed. Perhaps with Seth McFarlane behind the episode, some stuff could have been made better. I just wish Family Guy more lived up to the quality it had before its cancellation.
Uma Thurman Premieres “The Accidental Husband”
Uma Thurman Premieres “The Accidental Husband”
She’s world-renowned for her beauty and acting, and last night Uma Thurman showed up across the pond to premiere her new movie.
“The Accidental Husband” sees Thurman starring opposite English stud Colin Firth as a radio show host who has to choose between her British fiancé and a New York firefighter.
Fittingly, the “Kill Bill” babe arrived at the Leicester Square event in a London fire engine accompanied by Firth and six buff firemen.
She told press that she loved working with the “Love Actually” actor. “Colin is charming and wonderful. I had the best time with him and I would love to work with him again. He’s completely smooth and he has a dry humor which is fabulous.”
But she declined to reveal her Valentine’s Day plans. “I can’t discuss my personal life too much or it would become rather impersonal.”
Renee Zellweger Gets Doused
Renee Zellweger Gets Doused
It’s getting to be that time of year… leaves falling…hot cocoa…big cozy sweaters… firemen bursting into your apartment to put out the fire in your fireplace. That’s right, Renee Zellweger had her perfect night in ruined by some of New York City’s bravest.
Apparently some of the “Bridget Jones’ Diary” actress’ neighbors were worried when they smelled smoke. So they did the natural thing, and called the FDNY.
A source told press, “A truckload of fire-fighters arrived at Renee’s apartment. They came and put out the contained fire in her fireplace. It seemed very unnecessary, but maybe because it is so early in the season, the neighbor was concerned.”
Maybe Renee will have better luck setting the mood when she takes Sir Paul McCartney on a romantic getaway in the Hamptons. She booked an exclusive secluded cottage where they will spend some time getting to know each other, after having just met last month at a Tom Petty concert.
According to an insider, “The cottage has a piano and guitars, so she might be serenaded with an impromptu performance.”