Last Night With George Michael
George Michael showed off more than just his voice last night during the opening show of his new 25 Live tour.
“You could tell he wasn’t wearing underwear,” reports a concert-goer at the San Diego Sports Arena. “It was flopping all over the place.”
Manhood aside, the source raved that the concert was like nothing he had ever seen before.
“Everything from the his voice, to the lighting, to the stage was beyond anything I have ever experienced,” he said.
The two-and-a-half-hour show included about 20 songs, three costume changes, six backup singers and a production that reportedly cost upwards of $2 million to put together.
Before dedicating the ballad, “Amazing,” to his partner, Kenny Goss, the 44-year-old former Wham! heartthrob acknowledged California’s recent legalization of gay marriage. “He said, ’I was watching TV yesterday and saw two women get married,’” the source says. “The crowd went crazy.”
They also went crazy for clips from Michael’s vintage music videos, especially 1992’s “Too Funky,” which featured a slew of supermodels. Another video created just for the show and played during Michael’s cover of “Feeling Good” featured Dita Von Teese stripping down to nothing but pasties and her undies.
At the end of the night, Michael more than thanked his fans. “He was so humble,” the source says. “He got down his knees, and he was bowing to the crowd.”
The 25 Live tour is Michael’s first North American tour in 17 years.
George Michael Teeses His Fans
George Michael feels real good with Dita Von Teese by his side.
When the British pop singer launches his 25 Live tour tonight in San Diego, he’ll also debut a new video during his performance of “Feeling Good,” the song he performed on the finale of ABC’s Eli Stone.
Von Teese appears in the video doing what she does besther burlesque act. She wears, among other things, a rhinestone-covered dress and matching underwear. She also is seen swinging in a birdcage and frolicking in her signature champagne glass.
“I’m a huge Wham! fan, and this will be the highlight of my career,” Von Teese told the U.K.’s Daily Mail newspaper last month. “I have been perfecting my routine and I’ve also been doing Pilates.”
This is Michael’s first North American tour in 17 years and includes 22 cities.
Arrested Development: Top Banana - VIDEO
Do not adjust your web browser. You are now entering the Retro Squad, where we are reviewing past episodes of classic TV shows.
Many people will tell you that they got sucked into Arrested Development by its pilot. I wasn’t. For some reason, I didn’t watch the pilot when it first aired. But that’s just fine, because the second episode, “Top Banana,” was a perfect representation of everything AD ended up being. Throwaway jokes. Quick cut-aways and flashbacks. Subtle catchphrase generation. A “lesson of the week” couched in vicious barbs between members of the Bluth family. Oh, and two words that I’ll never forget: “No touching!”
What made this episode great is that it somehow was able to quickly establish who the characters were without having to use all the exposition that the pilot needed to do. If you were coming to the show for the first time, like I did, it didn’t take long to find out that George Sr. was in charge of the family and business, Michael is earnestly trying to run it the right way, GOB is a failed magician, Lindsay was over-privileged, Tobias is the world’s worst actor, Lucille was a shrewish drunk, and George Michael is secretly attracted to his cousin Maeby. The only character we don’t see is Buster, who, for some reason, isn’t in on the fun in this episode.
What struck me when I rewatched the episode (thank you Hulu! The episode is below for you to enjoy as well) was the same things that hit me like a sock full of nickels the first time around. The first thing was the throwaway jokes like “No touching!” All George has to do is brush an ice cream sandwich on Michael’s nose and he gets admonished for touching. Oh, and Michael’s line to George Michael about being Maeby’s boss at the banana stand made me howl the same way it did five years ago: “You stay on top of her, buddy. Do not be afraid to ride her… hard.” The horrified / titillated reaction on Michael Cera’s face — one that fans of Superbad and Juno now know very well — is priceless.
What I also loved was GOB’s saga with the dead dove. He claims that it died during his act, but pet store surveillance video shows otherwise. GOB’s plight reveals how the writers liked to layer callbacks upon callbacks, dropping funny lines without having to explain them to the audience like so many other sitcoms might. First he throws Michael’s mail in the water (many times, since an envelope isn’t exactly heavy), then, during the “next time on” sequence, he tosses the dead dove in the water (”Return from whence you came!” he bellows. Doves originated in the ocean?). When he subsequently drops the line “I’ve got a rabbit to buy,” we all know what’s coming next without having it explained to us. That’s the beauty of AD, and what kept me coming back after that episode.
Other fun stuff:
- Tobias’ shower sobbing when Lindsay gets the acting job he was going for. Notice that in some of those quick scenes, Tobias is wearing denim shorts. I was surprised to see him being a “nevernude” there, since I don’t think they had introduced that personality quirk of Tobias’ as yet.
- “There’s always money in the banana stand.” See, either Lindsay or GOB would have understood that line from George Sr. because, just like their dad, they’re both inherently corrupt. It figures that Michael, the “good son,” would take that line at face value.
- Lindsay about her daughter: “That stand won’t last a week with her there.” Wow. I don’t even think it lasted two days.
- For some reason, I forgot that Patrice O’Neal played T-Bone, “the flamer.” Tough Crowd was well underway by then, and that’s the way most people were introduced to Patrice. Anyway, I loved how he readily admitted to burning down the storage unit when Michael asked him about it.
- Lucille and Lindsay ever-so-politely trading insults over lunch. Linday is “fat,” according to Lucille. And Lucille is drunk, according to Lindsay, as well as everyone else.
- GOB on the Segway. That never stopped being funny.
Were there more slow spots than I remembered? Yep. But that’s OK. What’s remarkable about this episode is that, in retrospect, I’m shocked at how all the elements we loved about AD were on the show from the very beginning. It’s rare to see a show look the same at the beginning as it eventually does at the end. I remember laughing my ass off at the end of this one and saying to myself, “Wow. That was really, really good!” And that’s when I became hooked. And since AD was one of the best comedies I’ve seen in many years, I’ll forever remember this episode for making me a fan.
Five greatest GOB moments (season three)
This week TV has been paying tribute to Arrested Development with special Retro Squad pieces. I decided that I would highlight my favorite character from the show, GOB. After watching several episodes of Arrested Development, I realized that I couldn’t just narrow it down to the five greatest moments. I would have to do a list for each season.
You’ve already seen Five greatest GOB moments (season one) and Five greatest GOB moments (season two). After the jump, I have my favorite moments from season three.1. Steve Holt!
GOB: “Steve Holt is going to be here in a minute.”
Michael: “Your son.”
GOB: “According to him…”
Michaal: “And a DNA test.”
GOB: “I heard the jury’s still out on science.”
I know we met Steve Holt in season one but my favorite moment with GOB’s son is in “Notapusy.” GOB is unwilling to embrace fatherhood so he asks Michael to cover for him when Steve Holt comes over. However, GOB didn’t want Michael to steal his son outright.
My favorite part of this clip is when GOB’s breath fogs up the window.
Later on in the episode, GOB teaches his brother a lesson a la The Godfather by placing Michael’s bloody handlebars in bed with him.
2. The Godzilla Hoax
Not only does “Mr. F” give us some precious impressions of Godzilla by GOB, Buster, and George Sr., this episode gives us yet another one of GOB’s big ideas. When the Japanese financiers show up unexpectedly to check on their investments with the Bluth family, GOB decides to build a train set and pass it off as Sudden Hill. Like most of GOB’s ideas, it doesn’t work out quite as planned. The train set hoax turns into a trainwreck of a business meeting when Tobias and George-Michael ruin the model homes, Godzilla-style.
3. GOB goes to Iraq
In “Exit Strategy,” the Bluth family spends their time trying to avoid the impending deposition about George Sr.’s houses in the Middle East. Lucille and Lindsay go to rehab. Buster feigns a coma. Tobias says he can’t go because he’s trying out for a role in The Prosecution, a new CBS show. And GOB … well, GOB goes to Iraq. He wants to take his magic act on tour and George Sr. asked him to torch some Bluth homes.
He goes as Jesus Christ, the most famous of illusionists. But when GOB tries to perform Jesus’s “Burning Bush Illusion” he inadvertently riles Iraqi insurgents who think he wants to burn George Bush.
4. GOB, the accidental waiter
GOB: “Oh, I don’t have any drugs for sale. Unless, did you expect me to follow you to your car?”
Waiter: “Their your tips.”
Michael wants his siblings to get jobs in “S.O.B.S.” The Bluth family needs $100,000 for a retainer for a new attorney. Therefore, they are holding a fundraiser and want to look more sympathetic to the public. GOB, after scoffing at the idea, finds himself as a waiter at the family’s country club.
5. GOB steals George-Michael’s girlfriend
At the church and state fair during “Notapusy,” GOB awarded Ann third place in the Inner Beauty Pageant. After that, the two became romantically involved unbeknownst to Michael’s son. During the series finale, George-Michael discover the lovers on GOB’s new yacht. (By the way, the yacht is called “The C-Word.” Just thought I’d mention it.)